Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Test after Test

Oh man, I’m overwhelmed with where to begin to so let me start with sharing the highlights from the last few months….

I’m pregnant!

Jeff and I always agreed that we wanted more than one child and to have them close together in age. We would have started trying immediately after Colette turned a year old in October, but I didn’t want to chance being pregnant for the marathon (that never was) and I was adamant about not being knocked-up for our stinky cheese-saturated, alcohol-infused and oyster-encrusted New Year’s trip to Paris.

Shortly after we returned from our trip, I blamed my extreme tiredness on jet lag, but suspected it was something else when it lasted for days on end and my period never came.  I took a pregnancy test one night after work and showed it to Jeff at the kitchen counter. We were both really happy, but a little suspicious of its brand-X accuracy and at the speed at which it occurred.  It seemed too soon/good to be true. I had only been off the Pill for a month and it appeared that we had brought back quite the souvenir.

We kept it under wraps from friends and family for several weeks but shared the news once we received my OBs approval that it was in fact a viable fetus and not just a fluke/fart.

The first trimester was awful.  I never had morning sickness or nausea but suffered from a debilitating depression.  I had no interest in doing the things I enjoy most; socializing, exercising, working, parenting.  And, as a result I had feelings of extreme sadness, fear, and guilt.  It was also creating tension between Jeff and me.  It took a few weeks to recognize and diagnose, which I did with the help of my therapist (I’ll share more about that in another post) and a consult with a pre/post-natal psychiatrist.  Then, it took even more time to treat, which, I’m not sure I ever really did.  I went to acupuncture once a week for a month, which was both relaxing and a waste a money, sought support and advice from my closest friends and was on the verge of taking anti-depressants, but through research and thoughtful conversations with Jeff, my OB and therapist, decided to hold off for as long into the pregnancy as possible. I’m glad I did, because, once I hit my second trimester, it went away as quickly as it came.  I hope I don’t have to go through it again, but I feel more informed and empowered if I do.

Shawna’s Not Pregnant Anymore!

She’s better at telling that story than I am, so you can read all about it in her post.  We’re thrilled for the Kitzmans and can’t wait to get to know Emmeline! So far, she seems to be a great sleeper and eater; therefore, her middle name is a perfect fit!  I bet she’s hilarious too.

Mother's Day 

Edie, Dave, Emmeline

 I passed my PMP exam!

Studying with noise-cancelling headphones so Jeff can watch TV.
Blue bathrobe is still sadly on the scene.
Once my depression cleared, I had the energy and desire to re-focus on big picture challenges and goals that this pregnancy set into motion.   For example, Jeff and I plan to move to Connecticut in June of 2014, when our current apartment lease expires, which is another topic that deserves a post or two of its own.  Leaving NYC also means that I might need to part ways with Herman Miller, my employer, whom I adore.  In anticipation of that happening, I’m doing what I can now to improve my credentials and skills; ya know, like in addition to showing up 45 minutes late to work everyday.

Once the second baby arrives, I suspect spare time will be rare.  Knowing that, I decided to nail down a date to take my PMP (Project Management Professional) exam to become a certified project manager.  It’s an idea I have toyed with for several years, but solidified this fall, when my employer offered the required 35-hour course and to pay for the exam fee.  With the course complete, I submitted the required documentation set a test date for May 10th.  It was an aggressive study schedule, but I didn’t want to draw out the painful process any longer than necessary. So, for 6 weeks, I cleared my social calendar, asked Jeff to step up his parenting percentage, from like 60% to 80%, and buried myself in books, flashcards, note taking, and prep-tests.

Although, I was stressed and tired more often than not, I enjoyed the process of learning something new, having a concrete goal and found the content surprisingly interesting.  The 4-hour exam was super-sweat inducing hard, but I passed and I’m so proud to have it behind me.   It’s only been a few days, but I feel like I have all the time in the world now that I don’t need to spend every spare moment studying. 

Most of all I’m looking forward to paying more attention to Jeff and Colette…my rock and my gem.  They deserve a happy and non-stressed wife and mom, and that’s my biggest goal at the moment.